The other day I was doing squats at the gym. On the other side of the room a female trainer was also squatting. (Incidentally people have asked if we’re sisters because there is a slight resemblance, AND I saw her at the club I went to last night.)

I immediately start sizing her up, looking at her form, how much weight she’s moving and how many reps. I tend to do this with everyone who squats, but especially with women. Apparently I take squats very seriously.

At first it was no thang because she was only squatting 65 lbs (the bar plus two 10 lb plates). I warm up and do my first set of squats (110 lbs for 8 reps. I want to address this in the future, but my strength has gone down since starting a body part split and I’m working to get it back up.)

Then she takes the 10s off and replaces them with 25s. Now she’s squatting 95 and I’m staying at 110. Too close for comfort. I watch her intently. She does something like 15 reps and gets to about parallel with her depth.

Whatever, at least I go ass to grass, and I’m still doing 15 lbs more than her, I think to myself.

The whole time I’m anxious that she’s going to add weight to the bar and out-squat me. I realize that this is pretty ridiculous, but I am competitive. It’s strange to experience this inner rivalry and yet be completely aware of how unnecessary and petty it is.


On one hand, competition can be a good motivator to push us beyond our boundaries. On the other hand, it can very easily turn into something negative. I think there’s a fine line between friendly competition and a pissing contest.

I’m always talking about how women should be more open to lifting weights, yet when I encounter one I feel threatened. I guess that’s the only child in me coming out. This is MY area. I am the official weight lifting girl here. Who are YOU? Silly, yes, I know.

I don’t really have a point to all of this, except that I’d like to change this behavior. If I see another girl lifting, and I decide to go heavier because of it, it should be because I’m inspired, not threatened. Also, I’m wondering if anyone else reading this is as competitive as I am?

And this is kind of, sort of related in the sense that it reveals how psycho I am….
The other day I was driving to my self defense class and the parking lot was full. I circled around it once then went back in. As I came in the second time, a lady was walking into the lot to leave so I stopped and waited. Her car was actually right next to mine and I needed to reverse to let her out.

Only, a girl was behind me and she didn’t want to reverse because she wanted the parking spot. Oh hell no. I knew I was about to be that chick…the one who gets out of the car and walks up to the other person’s window and asks them to roll it down. Yeah, I did that. The conversation went like this:

Me: Would you mind backing up?
Girl: I can’t. There’s a truck there.
Me: There’s like four feet between you and the truck. I just need a little space to reverse so the lady can get out.
Girl: But I was here first.
Me: How were you here first if I’m in front of you?
Girl: You cut me off.
Me: I did NOT cut you off. (Which I didn’t…AT ALL.)

At this point some people walked up and told us that they were leaving and the space was right there. Nice way to diffuse the situation. Not that I would have done anything violent, but I did feel my bitch meter starting to rise. The thing is, I’m a considerate driver in a city of assholes. If you don’t live in Miami, ASK ANYONE who does. The people drive like dicks here. If I were in that girl’s position, I would have reversed in the first place (which she eventually did.)

At least I didn't do this.


Was getting out of my car a little extreme? I don’t give a shit. I think I was perfectly in the clear to ask her politely if she’d move. My cop friend told me that I was crazy because “everyone carries a gun here.” Whatever. I guess I live on the wild side then! My life is usually pretty boring. I need something to get my blood pumping, and that certainly did the trick. And I’m not sorry I did it at all.

6 comments on “I am competitive and crazy.”

  1. LOL Max basically got into a fight with a driver here yesterday. Ironic timing 😉 Drivers in FL are much worse than both Montana and Texas drivers. I think they’re about on par with Massholes, but then all the tourists come down and just eff up all over the place and it’s no contest. No wonder car insurance is an arm and a leg here. Good Lord.

    I’m really competitive too. I wish I could stop feeling threatened by — and then being bitchy to — so many females. Don’t know how to go about it though.

    • I think a good starting point is just being aware of the fact that you’re threatened or being unnecessarily catty. Might not change the way you feel at that moment, but over time it’s possible to erode that behavior by talking yourself out of it. That’s what I’m aiming for anyway.

  2. Dude, I hate driving in Miami because the city is teeming with assholes. People are pretty bad up here in the Tampa Bay area, but the aggression in Miami is out of control. When we go to the Keys, I’ll drive on Alligator Alley and on US 1 but I will not drive through the Miami area.

    About the competitiveness – I don’t really do that with weight lifting because I really worry about doing too much and hurting myself, but when it comes to running? BRING IT ON. I hate being passed by….I was in the process of typing up the list of people I hate being passed by, but it was getting so long that I realized I should just say I hate getting passed by ANYONE. However, if there is anything that gets my competitive fires burning, it’s the opportunity to outrun a younger or middle-aged dude. I did it today and it was awesome. (This probably speaks very poorly of me but oh well, at least I own my flaws.)

    • Yes, I hear Miami drivers are some of the rudest and craziest in the country. But I figure if I can drive safely here, then I can probably drive safely anywhere in North America.

      And honestly, I don’t blame you for feeling awesome for out-running a guy 😛 No offense to the fellas, but yeah.

  3. Haha that squatting situation is soooo me! I’m always sneaking peeks to make sure no other women are lifting heavier than me 😉

    PS. This is the first time I’ve actually been able to get on your blog – my work computer won’t let me load your page for some reason. I’m not sure whether it’s to do with my computer or your blog 🙁

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